I don’t want to look after my mother any more

Reference: Fataawa Noor ‘alad-Darb – Question No.6500, Pages321-322, Volume 12

Question: After what I have experienced of her over the past 14 years, I no longer want to be responsible for her. Bearing in mind I [tend to her needs and] look after her – and this is what the Sharee’ah has imposed upon me, is it possible for the Sharee’ah to [now] excuse me of this [responsibility]?

Response: The Sharee’ah will not excuse you of your responsibility to be dutiful to your mother; rather, you must [continue to] be dutiful to her to the best of your ability. Allaah (Tabaaraka wa Ta’aala) says:

{Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], “uff”, and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word. And lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy and say, “My Lord, have mercy upon them as they brought me up [when I was] small.”}, soorah al-Israa, aayahs 23-24

And I remind you that, if you live to an old age, then it is possible you may find yourself in the same situation as your mother, in terms of bad behaviour, and short sightedness, and quite possibly Allaah may [even] punish you in this world before the Hereafter – by your children who may not be dutiful to you.

He is a graduate of the Islaamic University of Madeenah, having graduated from the Institute of Arabic Language, and later the Faculty of Sharee'ah in 2004. He currently resides in Birmingham, UK.

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