Are children a blessing or a curse?

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Question: May Allaah protect and preserve you. When children are upon goodness, is this a blessing [from Allaah]; and when they are corrupt, are they a curse?

Response: [There is] no doubt, that children are indeed a blessing from Allaah if they are upon goodness; however, there is a reason for their being upon goodness, and that is good nurturing – the nurturing of the father towards them, as he ﷺ said:

«Teach your children to pray when they are seven [years old], and smack them if they do not when they are ten [years old], and separate them in their beds.» Transmitted by Abu Daawood, and declared authentic by al-Albaanee.

[So] goodness does not come by accident, there has to be a reason – and that [reason] is good nurturing; because bad nurturing causes the children to deviate away from the sound natural disposition [towards worshiping Allaah alone – as they were created], [as he ﷺ said:]

«Every child is born upon a sound natural disposition [towards worshiping Allaah alone], [and it is] then [that] his parents bring him up as a Jew, or a Christian, or a Magian.» Transmitted by al-Bukhaaree and Muslim.

And the nurturing of the father towards the children plays a big role – both in them being upon goodness, as well as their corruption; and he is responsible for them in front of Allaah Subhaanahu wa Ta’aala.

Translation originally published on 25 April, 2015

He is a graduate of the Islaamic University of Madeenah, having graduated from the Institute of Arabic Language, and later the Faculty of Sharee'ah in 2004. He currently resides in Birmingham, UK.

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